The modern versions of “I’m afraid of commitment” and “It’s not you, it’s me.”
分手時(shí)爛大街的話 “我害怕承諾”以及“不是你的問(wèn)題,是我的”,現(xiàn)在有了與時(shí)俱進(jìn)的新版本:
1. “I feel like we’re moving too fast.”
“我覺(jué)得我們節(jié)奏太快了點(diǎn)?!?/strong>
If a person says this and then suggests slowing down a little bit (maybe seeing/texting each other less during the week or whatever) then they are probably reacting accordingly to things getting serious more quickly than they’d like.
如果一個(gè)人說(shuō)這句話,并希望能夠慢下來(lái)(比如一周只見(jiàn)面或聯(lián)系一次等等諸如此類),有這種做法的人往往覺(jué)得這段感情變認(rèn)真的速度超出了他們的想象。
Fine! Understandable! If a person says this and then suggests no longer seeing each other at all (or [ugh] “taking a break”) then they’ve realized that they are no longer interested in this budding relationship but would rather end on infuriatingly open-ended terms than risk confrontation.
好吧!可以理解!如果有人這么說(shuō),并且建議大家最近不要見(jiàn)面(或者說(shuō),“休息一下”),那么他們應(yīng)該已經(jīng)意識(shí)到對(duì)這段感情不再那么感興趣,希望能順其自然的結(jié)束甚至不用冒著面對(duì)面分手的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)。
2. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“我不想傷害你”。
This one is baffling because there exists a vast middle ground between “being in a relationship and hurting someone” and “not being in a relationship and not hurting someone.” Part of it is “being in a relationship and not hurting someone”!
這個(gè)比較麻煩,因?yàn)樵凇罢剳賽?ài)傷害對(duì)方” 和“不在一起不傷害對(duì)方” 之間有一個(gè)巨大的灰色地帶。因?yàn)橐部梢浴霸谝黄鸬粋?duì)方” 啊!
So it’s strange that the person using this line thinks that the person being dumped doesn’t understand this? No one who hears this feels grateful for their feelings being spared. They might feel grateful for avoiding dating a turd.
所以那些說(shuō)這句臺(tái)詞的人,難道意識(shí)不到被甩的那一方不明白這個(gè)道理么?沒(méi)有哪個(gè)被甩的人會(huì)因?yàn)槁?tīng)到這句話對(duì)你的體貼感激涕零。他們只會(huì)慶幸沒(méi)有繼續(xù)跟渣人浪費(fèi)時(shí)間。
3. “I’m not looking for a relationship.”
“我沒(méi)有想認(rèn)真談戀愛(ài)?!?/strong>
On its own, this is a completely valid statement. Not everyone is looking for a relationship, and sometimes people who are both looking for relationships are actually looking for different ones! Different strokes, you know?
從這句話本身來(lái)說(shuō),這完全是一個(gè)有效的聲明。不是每個(gè)人都在尋求戀情,有時(shí)候那些尋求戀情的只是在找不同的玩伴而已!不同的刺激,懂了么?
But it is without a doubt the worst kind of person who says they aren’t looking for a relationship, allows the other person to walk away feeling like they experienced an honest and amicable parting of ways with a decent human whom they will think of fondly, and then announces their new relationship on Facebook three days later.
毫無(wú)疑問(wèn),這種說(shuō)自己沒(méi)有想談戀愛(ài)的這群人,往往會(huì)讓其他人覺(jué)得他們正跟無(wú)比喜歡的紳士經(jīng)歷了真誠(chéng)和平的分手,結(jié)果三天后又在社交網(wǎng)絡(luò)公布了自己的新戀情。